Choose Life

For as long as I can remember, a romantic relationship was something I longed for. I remember being as young as seven years old falling asleep at night with thoughts of love and romance on my mind. The idea that someone would look at a dweeb like me and choose me to love filled my heart with hope, wonder, and anticipation.

As I grew up into adolescence and young adulthood, this led to a heavily flirtatious way of life. I wanted a relationship so bad that I treated women as those who would possibly fill this great desire in my life for love instead of treating them as sisters in Christ. Many sins of speech were made by me in my high school and college years because I wanted to win someone over.

But as soon as I would have a young woman get close to me I would freak out and bail.

Every time.

Then came Jamie.

We dated for a year, were engaged for a year, and then on June 23, 2018, we got married.

My lifelong dream came true.

I had that God-honoring relationship I longed for with a beautiful woman. We set out on our honeymoon the next day: staying in the boiler room of a Carnival cruise ship. Had we hit an iceberg, we would’ve been the first to go.

On our honeymoon I had an experience I will never ever forget. I was standing on the adults-only deck of the cruise ship, looking out over the open ocean. My wife Jamie was sitting just a few feet behind me reading a book. I looked out over the water and thought “Is this it?”. My whole entire life I wanted what I now had more than anything on earth. And yet, I was empty.

Even the most healthy, amazing, perfect relationship with a beautiful follower of Jesus can not satisfy my soul.

Holding fast to my wife, as much of a gift as that is, doesn’t bring life.

What is it that you’re holding fast to?

Maybe it is the high of watching your kid succeed in athletics. I serve on staff at a church in North Texas, and around these parts athletics reign supreme. We live, move, and breathe sports, from Top of Texas football, to incessant travel ball opportunities on the weekends. We start young and we don’t let up. We expend all of the energy and money we have to make sure our kids have the absolute best shot at a scholarship.

But to what end?

Stress, anxiety, depression and the like are at all-time highs in the lives of our teens.

Holding fast to collegiate sport dreams doesn’t end in life.

Maybe it’s numbing the pain of a broken world. You have had fractured relationships, fractured dreams, and fractured hopes. Where do you turn? To the next season of Outer Banks, the 24/7 fear-mongering of your cable news network, or the quirky fun of Duolingo? It’s not so much that you are wanting to hold fast to something other than Jesus. It’s rather that you’d prefer to be hidden from the realities of life in a broken world.

Maybe it’s money. Stuff. The American Dream. You pursue the next vacation, next vehicle, next gadget, or next goldendoddle. And it only leaves you empty.

Here’s the beauty my friends.

There is One who offers us fullness of life. Not only high-quality life, but long-lasting life. And it’s not found in living vicariously through your kid, the next Amazon Prime show, or the trip you’re taking to Colorado.

It’s found in intimacy with God.

Listen to this.

I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice and holding fast to him, for he is your life and length of days, that you may dwell in the land that the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.” – Deuteronomy 30:19-20

The book of Deuteronomy is tremendous. Most people get lost in the weeds of weird laws and ordinances. But if you can zoom out and see the story it is telling, you see a glorious invitation to life. Over the next three months, I will be looking at this magisterial book with my students on Sunday mornings. I hope to share some of my thoughts and things that I have learned here for you to read as well.

Here’s what this passage, nestled into the story of Deuteronomy tells me.

Life found in God and nothing else.

Just as my daughter Gracie will likely face similar temptations towards specific sins like her father, history is cyclical. If we don’t look back and assess our history, we are doomed to repeat it and find the same results.

A look at Deuteronomy is a look at our history as God’s people. We can make the same exact mistake the people of God did in the wilderness. We can choose death instead of life. We can bring down the curse of sin’s effects on our lives, or we can walk in the blessings of the Father.

So many of us don’t realize that the choices we’re making effect our ability to walk in the realities of God’s blessings. We run at a lighting fast pace and don’t experience peace. We enviously gawk at the lives of those around us, all while missing out on gratitude and thanksgiving. We fret and freak and worry and get anxious as we fill our minds with the gunk of modern news, all while missing out on the abundant joy found in trusting in God’s sovereign purposes in the world.

Brother or sister in Christ, choose life.

Choose life.

When you hold fast to Jesus, you thrive.

When you obey His voice, you thrive.

When you obey His voice, you have the highest-quality life.

When you pursue Him above all else, you will come to see how He is dwelling in your midst.

So many believers cling to the things of this world hoping to eke out a little bit of life. Intimacy with Jesus feels foreign and weird so we try and do the American Dream with some Jesus sprinkled in there on the occasional Sunday and Wednesday.

I want you to know that all you’re doing is preventing yourself from experiencing real life.

To choose Jesus over athletics, academics, entertainment, prestige, or money is not to miss out on life.

It’s to find it.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

American Dream In A Choir Robe

What guides your life?

If I looked at your schedule, your finances, your conversations, your thoughts, your motivations, and your habits, what would they point to?

For far too many in the West, they certainly wouldn’t point to Jesus.

For far too often in my life, they don’t point to Him.

I 100% believe that following Jesus in the West has been condensed down to The American Dream in a choir robe. Get the big house, the lake house, the boat, the spouse, the two kids, the dog, the promotion, the popularity, the success. Get it all. Just make sure you pray before meals and go to church on the weekends if you’re not busy.

Y’all. That ain’t the call of the gospel.

But for far too much of my life, that has been the dream. I want all that this world has to offer.

Right now I’m hanging out at the beach in North Carolina, on a family reunion trip that we take every few years. When I was little, we came to this exact same beach. I remember standing out in the waves as a teenager, thinking about what my life would be like. I wanted to taste and see that America was good. I wanted to work in sports information and make a name for myself. I legit thought I would be working at ESPN as a statistician.

Fast-forward half of my lifetime and I’m looking out at the waves praising God that He didn’t give me what I wanted.

This world is insidious.

We can 100% enjoy beach trips and all the other pleasures of this world. They’re from God. They’re good when received with thanksgiving.

But all too often, I get hooked.

Here’s what I mean.

In 1 Corinthians 6, Paul is talking about the dangers of sexual immorality. In verse 12 he makes a statement that I believe applies to matters far broader than sexual activity.

“All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. – 1 Corinthians 6:12

As Christians, we have freedom. There are a thousand worldly things that aren’t mentioned in Scripture. And even those that are come down to belief not behavior.

When it comes to my choices concerning things of this world, this verse gives the perfect thought process. Is engaging in a certain activity, going on a specific trip, establishing a certain rhythm, or implementing a certain hobby helpful for my walk with Christ?

I’d rather miss out on a million worldly things if those worldly things dim my light for Christ or lessen my commitment to Him.

I used to think that those who said ‘no’ to certain worldly forms of entertainment or activities were crotchety old legalists. And maybe some were. But now I see that maybe they had it right.

Here’s the definition of dominate:

have a commanding influence on; exercise control over.

Oh geez.

Does that not sound like the church in the West? We have become controlled by the things of this world. We have bowed down to a different lord.

So how do we know if we’ve been dominated by worldly things?

Where does your money go to first?

What do you first think about when you wake up?

What is your weekly schedule operating around?

What do you talk about the most?

The answers to these questions show us what we’re being dominated by and controlled by. If the answer isn’t “God’s people, the Kingdom of God, making disciples, and the good news of the gospel” respectively, then I’ve bowed down to an idol. I’ve taken a good thing and made it a god thing in my life.

Can I confess my false gods?

Over the last few years, I’ve had three things that have taken the role of lord in my life, three things that while not unlawful became the core of who I am. And boy they’re embarrassing.

The first one was a stupid little white ball with dimples. Back in 2020, I played AT LEAST once a week. Instead of devoting time to God in prayer or study, or spending time with my wife, I would go hit a ball over and over again for four or five hours. It became what I wanted to talk about, post about, research, and receive gifts regarding. It dominated me and it didn’t help me in my walk with Jesus.

After much conviction, I put it back in its proper place. I still play from time to time, but it no longer dominates me.

The second one was a dual threat of TikTok and YouTube. From 2019-2021 off and on I would become overpowered by the need to watch idiotic videos at every free moment I had. It was bad. And boy it’s embarrassing. But I would get home from a tiring day of work and lay on the couch or in bed looking and laughing. Now, humor is a gift from God. Laughter and levity are gifts from God. But I was neglecting time with God in prayer and word because I ‘didn’t have enough time’. All while ScreenTime was saying I spent 4 hours on my phone daily.

After much, much, much conviction, I deleted TikTok and have slowly tried to waste less time on YouTube.

The last thing that dominated me was work. For the last several years work had become something that was a burden instead of something that was a joy. While circumstances may have contributed to that burden, I mostly did that to myself. My time at home was consumed by my responsibilities at work.

In two days (depending on how the vote goes of course) I’ll be starting a new chapter in ministry. My prayer is that it will take its proper place in my heart and life. It is not what my life is about.

My life should be about Jesus.

Brother or sister in Christ, I can’t tell you what you’ve become dominated by.

What I can tell you is that removing good and morally neutral things from your life isn’t legalist. It’s life-giving.

Every single week I want to think about and live in response to what will make the most like Jesus, what will make me pursue Him the hardest.

Let’s be honest, the pleasures of this world will not compare to the glories of the Kingdom.

So I’m more than willing to miss out on some here.

Let’s not be dominated by anything.

The American Dream is incomplete.

Let’s do only that which is helpful for our walk with Jesus.

Let’s do it together.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

I Don’t Want To Be In Charge

“Why won’t people listen to me? Why won’t they follow my lead?”

Three years ago, I sat in the office of Craig Lyle, the pastor at Faith Baptist in Wichita Falls. Those two questions came flying out of my heart as I tried to share with him what I was feeling and thinking about my ministry here at FBC Vernon.

We were a few months into what became a fifteen month pastor search, and I felt overlooked and ignored as a leader in the church.

So in great frustration I asked my mentor and friend why he thought that was happening.

Our relationship had begun due to my need for marital counseling. I was one year into marriage, and I was ruining it. My anger and frustration was boiling over into unkind and abrasive words towards my wife. I needed help. I needed someone to point me to Jesus.

So there I sat on the couch.

I felt ignored at church and ignored at home.

I mean, seriously. I was twenty-five years of age! Why didn’t my church and my family submit to my vast knowledge and wisdom? Why didn’t they follow my great expertise?

Yes, that’s laughable now.

But that’s exactly how I felt.

I don’t remember exactly what Craig said in response, but the gist was clear.

It was something along the lines of “do you love them?”.

He went on to say “Nate, you’re not called by Jesus to be a cowboy driving cattle. You’re called to be a shepherd leading sheep”.

Man.

That was a challenging and convicting word.

All of that came to mind today due to a verse that jumped off the page in my quiet time. I was reading Colossians chapter two.

and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority. – Colossians 2:10, NIV

Christ is the head over every power and authority.

That has so many implications in regards to governments and organizations, kings and kingdoms.

But what hit me was the fact that Christ is head over every authority, meaning he is head over mine.

I’ve been given responsibilities in my church. As I walk out these responsibilities, the fleshly desire to be followed, listened to, trusted, and affirmed can be high in me.

But here’s what this verse teaches me.

Here’s what I wrote in my journal after reading this verse.

“I’m first and foremost a man under authority. Before I think about leading others, I have to remember I’m being led. I report to Jesus, my LORD. He is the authority that I am to submit to. This isn’t my youth group. It’s the LORD’s.”

That changes everything about leadership, doesn’t it?

If life is about me being in charge, I may guide people down a path, but they likely won’t feel loved along the way.

If life is about Someone being in charge of me, I’m going to seek to lead others the same way that I’m being led.

As I reflect on this, I worship.

The One in charge of me loves me. The One in charge of me is gentle, humble, patient, compassionate, merciful, kind, persistent, relational, intimate, and personal.

Wow.

That’s the type of leader I want to be.

The older I get, the less I want authority and power if I’m being honest with you. At times, the idea of me having authority feels dirty to me. Now I know from Scripture that godly men need to lead the people of God. So I keep going. But there are moments I just don’t want any part of the power structures of man.

The older I get, the less the desire to be in charge appeals to me.

The older I get, the more I want to love people like Jesus.

I’m asking God to bring that about in me.

I want those who are around me to see me as gentle, humble, patient, compassionate, merciful, kind, persistent, relational, intimate, and personal.

That truly brings a tear to my eye.

God, please let it be so.

At home, I want my wife and daughter to see Jesus in me.

At work, I want men and women to see Jesus in me.

If I’m given authority, I’ll use it.

But I want to use it in one way.

To love like Jesus.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

Seek The Lord

Lately I have been trying to get into God’s word and grow in wisdom. I’m twenty-eight years old, and in a lot of areas of my life, I still need to grow up. I need the Spirit’s help through the study of the word and prayer.

A couple weeks ago, I was reading in Zephaniah, looking for Biblical wisdom.

This verse jumped off the page:

Seek the Lord, all you humble of the land, who do his just commands; seek righteousness; seek humility; perhaps you may be hidden on the day of the anger of the Lord. – Zephaniah 2:3

What do I seek?

When I look at the year or month or week ahead of me, what is it that I’m pursuing with my time and energy?

Sometimes I look at the week ahead and simply think about the responsibilities I have. I’m striving to lead my family as a husband and father. That takes intentionality. I’ve got seminary assignments. I’ve got work assignments. I am now an umpire for the local Boys & Girls Club softball league. I’ve got students that I’m meeting with for discipleship. I’ve got upcoming D-Now speaking engagements.

I’m seeking a lot of earthly things.

Many of those things are good things.

Obviously being a God-honoring spouse and father is important.

Doing my school work and work work for the glory of God is important.

But what is it that I’m chasing?

Without intentionality, a week can go by with no real growth in my walk with God.

To avoid this, I need to apply that verse from Zephaniah to my life.

Seek the Lord.

How can I commune with God this week? That’s the most important question, the most important part of my schedule.

I occasionally struggle with staying asleep. For instance, I’ve been up since 2:30 AM, and I’m writing this post at 5:15 AM. I would love to be sleeping right now. Especially with a busy day of preaching and hosting students for dinner ahead of me. But here I am.

And you know what?

It’s been beautiful. Sure, I watched a couple YouTube videos. But for the most part I’ve been reading some and praying some and journaling a whole lot. I feel God’s presence close, intimately close.

I wrote in one of my journals that I would take this feeling of intimacy with God over sleep every time.

I wish I could say this was a daily reality. It’s not.

Again, this verse is kicking my butt.

I need to seek the Lord, seek righteousness, seek humility.

How can I become more righteous, more like Christ, this week?

How can I grow in humility (something that is central to my identity as a follower of Jesus, something I don’t have to work to have but rather seek to implement: see Philippians 2:5) this week?

Zephaniah tells me.

By doing just commands.

God’s commands that is.

If I seek to live in step with the commands of God in Scripture, I will over time, through the work of the Spirit, become more like Him and grow in humility and righteous living.

Humble, righteous men and women change communities because humble, righteous men and women give God all of the glory instead of seeking to hoard it for themselves.

Oh goodness I’ve got a long laundry list of times where I sought to get a little bit of God’s glory for myself.

It never pans out.

Brother or sister in Christ, seek the Lord this week.

He will be found!

May our communities be overflowing with men and women who seek the Lord and imitate His humility and righteousness to a watching world.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

A Committed Church

Paul gave thanks always for the church in Thessalonica (1 Thessalonians 1:2). They were a joy of his. We can see in 1 Thessalonians 1 why they so profoundly impacted his heart. Chuck Swindoll, in his commentary on 1 Thessalonians, highlights how the people of God in Thessalonica had committed to three things: each other, non-believers, and Christ. We would do well to look at what their commitments entailed.

1. Commit To Stir Each Other On

If I am to live a life of faith, love, and hope like the believers in Thessalonica, I need help. I’m prone to discouragement. That is something that is engrained in me due to circumstances and sin and I’m constantly needing to work on that part of my heart. I don’t naturally live with vibrant hope. That’s where friends and fellow church members come in. In my years here in Vernon, I have been the recipient of words of affirmation that have helped me to keep going and to keep ministering. It’s likely that you need others too. It’s not weakness to need to be lifted up from time to time. Living life as a follower of Jesus is difficult in a fallen world. We need to encourage each other more than we do.

We need to be deeply committed to one another. We live in a culture of isolated nuclear families. That culture effects how we read the Scriptures and how we apply them. We are designed to be together. I’ve sought to break through some of this milieu by telling people that my home is open to anyone and everyone. I try and live a life of deep openness. In doing this my prayer is that people come to realize that one, pastors are normal men, and two, life is better when we’re walking through it together.

The church in Thessalonica was known for its works of faith, labors of love, and steadfastness of hope. If we want our churches to be known for the same things, we need to equip and empower one another to pursue those things.

2. Commit To Live In A Way That Draws Non-Christians In

The church in Thessalonica was known for its powerful response to the gospel.

And you became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you received the word in much affliction, with the joy of the Holy Spirit, so that you became an example to all the believers in Macedonia and in Achaia. – 1 Thessalonians 1:6-7

The surrounding regions knew about the faith of these Thessalonian believers. That’s a powerful testimony.

It gets me thinking. Do my actions and way of life match up with what I claim to believe about Jesus? Are non-believers drawn into the community of faith I’m a part of because they see a man who is wholly different than them?

Or, do they see a man who claims to worship the King but fails to live for the King in certain areas of my life, either public or private.

My prayer is that I would be different.

Whenever I feel at home in our country, our culture, our community, it gives me pause. Yes, God has a purpose for me in any place I find myself. But I should never be too comfortable here. This isn’t my home. And if I never feel different or distinct or placeless, then I likely am not living in a way that is too different from those around me.

We as God’s people need to commit to live in such a way that draws others in.

3. Commit to Pursue Christ Rather Than Idols

The church in Thessalonica was also known for their turning from idolatry.

For they themselves report concerning us the kind of reception we have among you, and how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, – 1 Thessalonians 1:9

What are your idols?

It’s highly unlikely you have statues to other gods in your living room.

Idolatry in our modern church is much more insidious and subtle and dangerous.

A good diagnostic question to help you discover your idols is “what makes you the most angry?”

What posts on social media or news stories or conversations or circumstances get you riled up the quickest? At the heart of whatever it is is something you value. We get angry when that which we value or that which we love is threatened.

So what gets you angry?

I know for me it is typically revolving around respect. I’m an insecure man and when I feel like I’m not getting the respect I think I deserve, I get angry. This caused problems in my marriage early on, and still threatens to impact many of my relationships. I’ve had to realize that I idolize being respected and affirmed. So when I’m not, which is often, I can get heated. It doesn’t often come out in words, but it certainly fills my mind and heart and spirit. This is an idol I have to actively rid myself of.

The church in Thessalonica moved to the living and true God. They moved away from idolatry. They were committed to this endeavor.

Paul’s words urge us to be free from any and all entanglements that pull us away from the Savior. – Chuck Swindoll

This is easier said than done.

It’s painful.

It’s painful for me when I come face to face with the idols I’ve placed above God.

But on the other side of that pain is the joy of finding my security and identity in Christ.

The church in Thessalonica was committed to each other, the non-believers around them, and Christ.

May we do the same.

A Slow Burn

Churches that seek to cause great numerical growth at a fast pace tend to cause explosions that do lots of damage to lots of souls.

We need to return to the slow burn of relational discipleship. It’s messy. It’s painful. Mistakes are made and opposition is faced. But it’s the Biblical way.

Check out an (I think) encouraging conversation about this based in 1 Thessalonians 2:1-2. You can listen below, or go find the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Google Play. Just search Roach Ramblings!

The Heart-Changer

It’s Wednesday night at 8:45 PM. I’m driving home and reflecting on the day. Thirteen hours of work and I’m ready for sleep. Over the course of a week I had studied the Bible, scoured commentaries and books on theology, written a sermon, and delivered it twice. What I got in return was blank stares, students doodling on their note papers, and a seeming lack of passion.

That’s when the spiritual exhaustion is at its peak.

You’re likely not a youth pastor reading this.

So maybe you can grasp one of these other sets of circumstances.

You speak often about Jesus in your home, encouraging your children to follow Him, to seek first the Kingdom. All of your unique attempts at digging into Scripture with them seem to come up short. They are enamored with the things of this world, pursuing the American Dream, and your attempts at discipleship in the home don’t seem to be bearing fruit.

Your dear friend or family member is far from God. They have been for a while. You’ve prayed for them countless times. It’s not that you’ve stopped praying for them, that God would touch their hearts. It’s just that when you’re deeply honest with yourself, you’ve stopped believing that they will ever change.

Your community is full of sin and wickedness. The churches in your community are dwindling and shrinking, and it feels like things are hopeless. Those that walk under the banner of Christ aren’t honoring him with the things they post and the vitriol that is thrown back at the church disorients you and discourages you.

There are times when we feel hopeless.

There are times when we feel like there’s nothing else we can do to impact our family members, our churches, our communities.

And that’s exactly what we should be feeling.

Last Friday, it hit me afresh when I was reading a few chapters out of the book of Exodus as part of my quiet time. The people of God had been enslaved in Egypt for centuries, and now under the leadership of Moses they were being rescued by God. At the time of their departure, they were shown favor by their former captors, and this favor was from the Lord.

The people of Israel had also done as Moses told them, for they had asked the Egyptians for silver and gold jewelry and for clothing. And the Lord had given the people favor in the sight of the Egyptians, so that they let them have what they asked. Thus they plundered the Egyptians. – Exodus 12:35-36

There are a ton of examples from Scripture regarding the way that God is the one who moves in the hearts of men. This one was simply the one that stood out to me and impacted me last weekend.

Seriously. Think about what is happening here.

The people of God were enslaved.

And now those, whether they were actively serving as task-masters or were passive observers, who had been enslaving the people of God are lavishing them with silver and gold and clothing.

But did they do this of their own accord? By no means. We read that the Lord had given the people favor in the sight of the Egyptians. God was the one who was working in the hearts of the people. The same God who by His sovereignty hardened the heart of the unnamed Pharaoh for His glory (as hard as that is to accept) now softened the hearts of the Egyptians for the sake of His people.

This floored me last Friday.

I would love to be in control of how people respond to the proclamations about Jesus that I make each Wednesday night and Sunday morning and occasionally at other times during the week. I would love to tell you that you have the power to change your prodigal family member’s heart, your child’s heart, or the spiritual health of your community. We love to pretend to be saviors.

But we’re not in control. We don’t have the power. And when we acknowledge that and rest in that we find the answer to seeing change happen.

Praying for the Spirit to move.

It’s only been six days. But I’ve been striving to push into that. I’ve been striving to get on my knees and pray for the Spirit of God to move. And you know what? He is.

He’s at work.

He’s always at work, but when I ask Him to move by the Spirit to soften the hearts of those who hear the Kingdom message, I begin to open my eyes to how He’s been working all along. It’s like buying a car. When I bought my Chevy Malibu, I started seeing them everywhere. It’s not that my purchase of a Chevy Malibu was followed by an outpouring of Malibu purchases in Vernon. It’s that I simply had my eyes opened to see them everywhere.

Here’s how God has been at work in my life recently. I desperately long to invite people into a deep, Christ-honoring, Spirit-led intimacy with the Father and passion for the Kingdom. I desperately want people to set their minds on things above and live for the only thing that matters. And I want to use the home God has so richly blessed me with to do so. I want to have adults and students in and out of it every day, growing into the image of the Son of God. As bad as I want that, it’s not been happening much.

But yesterday I prayed throughout the day that God would use His Word, a sermon on John 1:35-42, to ignite a fire for the Kingdom of God in the hearts of our students. I prayed that God would begin to use our home as a place for people to reorient themselves around the Kingdom.

After all of these prayers for the Spirit to move, in the span of an hour five students asked to come over to our house, three of them asking to be intentionally discipled by me and my wife. We are starting a Bible study open to the public on Sunday night and I pray we have many come.

Your prodigal needs the Spirit of God to work in their heart.

Your children need the Spirit of God to work in their heart.

Your community needs the Spirit of God to work in its streets.

Thankfully, we have a God who softens the hearts of the sinful and gives His people favor.

Let’s ask Him to do so.

If you enjoyed this post, would you consider sharing it on social media? The algorithm is not kind to small blogs like mine, and I’d love for people to be encouraged by my writings.

What’s On Your Mind?

My mind races almost all the time. There are normally a dozen thought processes running through my head from moment to moment. It’s the way I’m wired.

It’s become such a part of me that my wife knows I’m lying anytime I answer ‘nothing’ when she asks me what I’m thinking about.

From the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep my mind is on the run.

So I’ve striven to live a life of meditation.

You see, the Biblical view of meditation is the process of filling your mind. That’s what it means to meditate.

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. – Psalm 1:1-2

Oh how I desire to be that man.

The beautiful part of Psalm 1 is that it opens our eyes to the reality that happiness is found when we delight ourselves in meditating on God’s Word (v. 1).

Don’t you want to be happy? I certainly do. I want a life full of happiness that is grounded in the work of Christ and the beauty of His Word. I want to wake up excited to take on the day ahead, and that’s not always the case.

A lot of days I wake up and I’m just trying to summon the strength to get going.

That’s not God’s design for us.

He doesn’t want to produce flippant, fickle, ungrounded men and women who don’t acknowledge the realities of a Genesis 3 world. But at the same time He desires for His people to be the happiest of people.

Happiness isn’t found in mindless scrolling of social media. Happiness isn’t found in filling our minds with the latest Covid conspiracy theories, anecdotal articles that focus on self-help, or angry editorials that idolize our nation and our political party. Happiness is found in filling our minds with God’s Word.

Psalm 1 differentiates between the counsel of this world we reside in and the counsel of His Law. The opening verse encouraged us to avoid the counsel of the wicked, the sinner, and the scoffer.

How much of what I fill my mind with falls under that?

Instead, we are told by God to fill our minds with His Word. Day and night. If you instinctively go for your phone in moments of waiting, utilize that. When you’re in line at the grocery store. When you’re brushing your teeth. When you’re waiting for a few minutes before a meeting. When you’re waiting a few minutes for your spouse to get home. When you’re in those spaces where you grab your phone, go to your Bible app. Meditate. I think you could fill your mind with so much more Scripture than you might think if you intentionally stole those moments of waiting and instead of checking Instagram you read some Scripture.

Day and night.

Meditate.

Your time in God’s Word should not be casual and flippant. It should be voracious. We should be hungry for more of it, for it helps us commune with the Trinitarian God we love.

Meditation involves taking the Word seriously by our determining to make use of more than a casual and occasional reading of the Bible. – Alton McEachern

Do we take the Word seriously?

I don’t.

It’s much more easy and convenient to fill my mind with mindless stuff instead of filling it with Scripture.

May we grow to be happy men and women who passionately pursue a deep study of the Scriptures.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

Dead Men Walking

When we were dead in our trespasses. 

That’s how the book of Ephesians (2:5) describes the state of our being before encountering Jesus.

We were dead.

We weren’t ‘struggling’ with sin or ‘falling into’ sin.

We weren’t morally good for the most part with just some natural, human struggles.

We were dead.

Deceased.

Kaput.

That’s where we were.

Look at Ephesians 2:1.

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins. . . – Ephesians 2:1

The book of Romans, chapter five, expands on this language.

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. – Romans 5:6

but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8

For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. – Romans 5:10 

Weak.

Ungodly.

Sinners.

Enemies of God.

That’s a pretty bleak reality.

This should impact us in a litany of ways. But here’s a few things it gets me thinking about.

Who Is God Calling You To Help Rescue? 

A lost person is unlikely to enter our church building on a whim. That may have been a societal, cultural reality in the past, but it is certainly not the case today.

We are called to bring people into Christian community, not primarily a sanctuary. I believe that lives will first be changed around our dinner tables in our homes. From there, some may have the boldness to come sit in our pews. I believe that hospitality is the key to winning the battle against religious apathy and agnosticism.

I have heard, seen, and read Christians talk about the lost in surprisingly unkind ways (myself included). We judge them on how they act, dress, drink, talk, think, etc.

Have we really forgotten the Bible?

The Bible teaches us that God looks at the interior soul of a man, not their choice of dress. The Bible never calls us to judge the non-believer, but rather to hold the believer accountable (both of which we don’t typically follow well). The Bible tells me that I was a dead, ungodly, wicked enemy of God.

Whenever I drive past a jail on my way to Wichita Falls, I think about how I’m no better than any man or woman in there. The only difference is that God’s grace has kept many of my fleshly desires in fleeting thoughts in my mind and not my actions (they are no less wicked).

The same is true for believers and non-believers.

Some of us have received God’s grace, and the rest of us need to hear of it.

Lastly, this pushes us to evangelize differently. We are to build relationships. What we are telling people with the gospel is that they are evil, wicked sinners that are dead spiritually and destined for hell. That’s a weighty message. It’s a message that must be proclaimed, but it is weighty.

You may disagree with my methods of evangelism, but I think our churches would be far better at it if the emphasis was on relationships as opposed to numbers. For me that helps me make it about love and not just the pressure of making sure I tell a certain number of people.

Are You Living Joyfully In Light Of This? 

The second impact this has on me is that it should drive me to profound joy.

Life is mega-hard.

Today was honestly a rough one. Lots of thinking about what the future holds. Honestly lots of thoughts of hopelessness in the face of tragedy that I’ve had to take captive and give to the Lord. Some days are like that. In this current season of my life, many days are. I have had to cling to God today, or rather rest in His clinging on to me.

Despite life’s mega-hardness (as a budding academic theologian, that sounds so professional), I have experienced joy.

Why?

Because I was dead.

And now I’m not.

Now I’m alive.

Jesus rescued me, redeemed me, changed me, bought me, saved me. And now, He’s sanctifying me. Day by day. Through His Word. Through prayer. Through community. Through mentors. Through friends.

I’m not the man I was this time last year (praise God). I’m not the man I was ten years ago. God is changing me, molding me, growing me. Making me more and more like Himself.

Joy in my life isn’t always a bubbly personality and an ear to ear smile.

Often it is a deep seated remembrance that God is with me and that He has not abandoned me.

Are You Teaching Morality or Jesus? 

Lastly, this should impact the way we parent, teach, disciple, preach, lead.

For those that are dead, they need to be brought to life. They don’t need to be simply told that they’re dead. While God is the one that does this, we have a role to play.

We sometimes (if not all the time) expect non-Christians to act like Jesus (all while we’re not there yet). We teach them how they should live. We quote Scripture to them about alcoholism and crude language (both of which are sinful, but the Bible addresses my ability to be religious without a heart for God and others far more often). But that’s like throwing a book about how to swim to a person who is drowning. We should rescue, and then teach.

God forgive us for our judgmental hearts and teachings.

For those that have been made alive in Christ, they don’t need to be taught primarily how to be a better person. Because the message of Scripture, as we’ve clearly seen here, is not about bad people becoming good. It’s about dead people coming to life. Every sermon I preach, every discussion question I write, every blog, every podcast, every video should be about this full life.

Yes, God calls us to live a certain way.

But the core of the matter is that we’ve been made alive.

Not because we were morally good.

God doesn’t care about that.

But because He was rich in mercy and love.

We were dead men walking.

Now we are alive.

In His Name,

Nathan Roach

 

 

 

Manhood & Mister Rogers

I obviously did not know Mister Rogers personally. But by all accounts, it seems like he was a meek, kind, compassionate, and humble man.

I wonder if men’s ministries in our churches would accept him as a leader.

Over Thanksgiving break, I went to see A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood with Jamie and her family. Personally, I loved it.

Back at OBU, I had the opportunity to be a part of leading the men’s ministry on campus for several years. While in Phoenix, I sat in on a men’s ministry. I’ve read many books on the topic. It’s something I’m passionate about.

And with all of these experiences and lessons learned, I think that we need more men in our churches like Mister Rogers.

There’s a passage in Colossians that I came across that has me thinking more and more along those lines. At this point in the letter, Paul is encouraging the followers of Jesus at Colosse to put their sin to death, replacing those sinful behaviors with that which is in accordance with Christlikeness. He says this:

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. – Colossians 3:12-14

So, in summary, according to Paul a follower of Jesus (men included) should be:

• compassionate
• kind
• humble
• meek
• patient
• forgiving
• loving

Somewhere along the way, in American churches, strength and courage, bravado and bravery have taken the lead when it comes to what men should be like. I wrestle with that a lot, because those things wouldn’t exactly be on my epitaph.

I know a ton of godly men, in my church, in my community, and in my past. Men who have and are pouring into me. This is obviously not an indictment against all men everywhere.

I just want to push back against the idea that a godly man must be aggressive, strong, boisterous, etc. I would in fact make the argument that the godly man should look more like the list above. And I will tell you from firsthand experience that the men who have been the most impactful in my life have some or all of those characteristics.

I have nothing at all against hunting or home improvement. But if I’m being real candid I have felt some (possibly self-induced) feelings of being ‘less than’ at different times in my life for not enjoying the prototypical male activities. I have wrestled with the way that God designed me to be, the gifts He’s given me.

I used to be an extremely loud, obnoxious, flirtatious, annoying, braggadocios, vulgar turd. As I’ve grown closer to the Lord, He has been pulling me away from those things. Well, maybe not the obnoxious part (as I wear a sequin-infested, dinosaur Christmas sweater while typing this).

I want to invest in younger men (something that both my full-time job as a pastor and part-time job with FCA allows me to do, praise God), and show them that manhood isn’t obscene and vulgar and loud. Manhood is service, meekness (the characteristic some say is ‘wussifying’ masculinity in our country), and humility. I want them to get that a lot earlier than I did.

I’ve read, listened to, and heard from men that masculinity is mostly strength and courage. But I’ve also seen many of these same men fall from grace. Hard. Private sexual sins and vulgarities and obscenities are ripped into the light. Anger and misogyny and domineering behaviors uncovered.

Why is it that so many men who have talked about manhood have had great public charisma and strength but little Christlikeness in private? Could it be because we’ve been teaching men the wrong things?

Have we focused so much on the man’s role in leading the family that we have forgot to talk about serving the family? Have we focused so much on outward strength that we’ve missed inward fruits of the Spirit?

Have we allowed Braveheart, Gladiator, and Saving Private Ryan to outshine Christ?

This past semester at the church I work at, we walked through the book of 1 Samuel with our youth and children. Jonathan leaps off the page.

Here you have a man who singlehandedly wins a battle for the people of God. Talk about strength and courage. These are not bad things. But he also was willing to relinquish his genetic right to the throne, giving it to David instead. Not only that, he wept over David, cherished his relationship with David, and saved him again and again. Here’s a man who had strength and courage, but that wasn’t all. He also was an empathetic, compassionate, humble, and kind man.

What a great example of what I personally believe manhood should look like.

I have another great example.

My dad.

My dad is strong. My dad is brave. My dad is courageous.

But my dad is also humble. My dad is kind. My dad is a servant.

And all the time, I mean all the time, he tells me one simple phrase. It’s not “be loud and proud”. It’s not “be rude and crude”. It’s not even “work hard and go hunt”.

It’s this.

“Be God’s man.”

And I want to tell younger men the same thing.

Be God’s man. 

Be a servant. Be someone who helps others in need. I’m not good at this one, but I’m working on it.

Be compassionate. When I see men tear up, I don’t think “what a pansy”. I think, “what a Christlike heart”.

Be kind. Sexism, sarcasm, rudeness and crudeness are not the way of Jesus. Be kind.

Be humble. You’re not all that and a bag of chips.

Be meek. Again, our culture doesn’t really like men like this. But Jesus was meek and gentle. Strength is not violent and aggressive. Strength is gentle.

Be patient. This world doesn’t revolve around you.

Be forgiving.

Be loving. Are you known for your jump shot, your wit, your looks, your intelligence, or your loving nature? Are you known more for the power of the Spirit (public life) or the fruit of the Spirit (private life)?

I think the world needs more men like Mr. Rogers.

I think the world needs more men like Jesus.

In His Name,

Nate Roach

 

No copyright infringement is intended in using this picture of Mister Rogers